He tells me he will help more around the house if I go back to work. So far, we're 0-2. In the four months I worked last spring, he did help with a couple of the kids' appointments. And some housekeeping on weekends (never consistently). But that was about it. Even on the weekends when I had drill between full weeks of my temp day job? He wouldn't even go to the grocery store so we could have dinner the following week. His reason was that he never grocery shops when I'm at drill. No kidding. Because when I wasn't working full time, I would shop earlier in the week, knowing I wouldn't be home to do it that Sunday.
Did he somehow think I'd skip a weekday at work to get groceries? Or that they would magically appear? And his idea of helping at martial arts practice was to stay at work until class was over (between 7:30 and 8) and then go pick up the kid. Not coming home to take the kid to class, or help with the second kid practice, or dinner, or whatever.
This time it was a single work week. Just 5 days. I made sure the kids were up and off to school, homework asked about and checked, dinner made or at least something to eat every night. Grocery shopped one evening after work, loaded dishwasher before work, made sure kids emptied it. Sorted out work clothes each day, made sure I had something to pack for lunch. He handled one kid appointment, which was great, and cleaned up most of the dinner dishes (but not all) one night. One. The counters and stove top went dirty all week. (yes I could have done it. Point is he doesn't, won't, even after swearing he'll help)
I thought he'd get to it this weekend, since he can be a leave-it-all-week, clean-on-weekend-guy, but no. This was, apparently, his weekend to do mostly nothing since he'd worked all week. He did do some laundry. No vacuuming, dusting, yard work. Did have a list of chores for the kids to complete, though.
He did get up to help pick up the kitchen tonight, only after realizing I was irritated about doing it myself. He quit after wiping off some of the counter top. Left the bottle of cleaner sitting on the stove - and the stove dirty along with the rest of the counter. But he jumped up and spent nearly 2 hours trying to help kid reset her IPAD.
If I say anything to him about any of this, he looks at me blankly. He'll say he did help. Or apologize and say next time he'll do better. And then get mad when I don't believe he will actually help next time. The only thing he does consistently is be inconsistent.